Written by Francesca Luca:
When is it time to tell a guy when the relationship is over. I’m thinking of breaking up with my boyfriend. He cheated on me for the 3rd time. I can’t take it anymore.
Rob, Beth and I tackled this question on Friday morning on LoveBites Segment of the South Shore Morning News. The consensus was we champion self-respect over reconciliation.
Robert Green says, “Nobody ever does anything once. Believe it. If they do it once, be assured they will do it again.” Good people do bad things, but cheating three times is pretty bad!
When we feel unsafe as anyone would after being cheated on, there isn’t much room to reconcile. No one can stop you from trying once again, but we concurred on the LoveBites Segment that doing so would be just setting yourself up for some serious hurt.
An unsettling truth, but it’s time to face the music and go “no contact rule” as in BLOCK.
We also discussed at length what cheating actually is. It starts before the bedroom. Flirting, secret conversations, hiding messages; all these and more are emotional connections that are dangerous because they involve trust and vulnerability which is the very foundation of a relationship.
Best advice is to take ownership of your life as your partner isn’t concerned about protecting your heart. My strong recommendation would be to acknowledge that you are dealing with a disrespectful man, tell him short and sweet it is over and then go “NO CONTACT”. Take note that any conversation after the breakup is giving him permission to start the unhealthy and painful cycle again. Good Luck.
